Unhealthy Relationships

My coworker recently just got married. At first I was excited and happy for her, because they’ve been engaged for over 5 years.

However, for the past year I’ve known her, it’s been nothing but her venting about things she doesn’t like he does. For example, he LOVES to go out with his coworkers (people he already sees 12-14 hours a day) when he’s off work. Which cut into their quality time. He’d rather drag her to the bar WITH him and his friends so they could all hang out. On their honeymoon, they hung out with HIS friends. It seems he has a dependency on his friends.  She’s expressed how she feels to him, but it falls on deaf ears.

I feel bad for her because my boyfriend is so thoughtful and treates me how she wants to be treated by her husband. Yikes.

Before she went through with her marriage, another coworker and I were discussing how afraid we were for her, because he puts in more effort than he does when it comes to the relationship. Even though we’ve told her, she still decided to marry him and put up with it.

Sometimes people in unhealthy relationships don’t hear this, even thought hey should remove themselves from the situation. What would you do if this was someone you cared about?

Dating: My Problem

My problem with dating….

  • I start off with “talking” to too many guys.
  • One date doesn’t equal a relationship
  • I catch feelings
  • I’m somewhat possessive
  • I’m jealous
  • I don’t speak my mind.

It’s so hard to find and meet people on this island, so I talk to strangers. I never really have intent on meeting anyone off the internet, but last year I got a bit adventurous.. I met a few people and it was fun. You know? You talk to someone for a long long time and when you finally meet it’s like oh wow, this is greater than texting.

My thing is… I hate dating. I hate the concept of it. It’s like how do I date ONE person and see if it’s going to lead to a relationship. I speed up the process by talking to a few different guys. I have a hold on people because some of them I talk to for months and months or years and never having met.

Sometimes, I fixate on feelings for ONE guy and I feel it’s serious. So we exchange the whole pet name, “Babe. Baby.” But I have to keep reminding myself that doesn’t mean we’re in a relationship!! Right now? I think I caught feelings and I’m jealous that he’s dating other people, at least he’s not IN a relationship with other people?

Men will never understand…

… neither will anyone else.

I guess you can say I’m a very… difficult personality to deal with. I’m glad that the people in my life, remain in my life. I’m just very very hard to please.

I recently got a package from Richard in the mail. Last year, I told him I thought baby hippos are cute. What does he do? He orders a hippo stuffed animal for me… Umm? I didn’t ask for a hippo toy, nor am I like “other girls” that collect stuffed animals. It seems my words or actions seem to make people want to buy me something. This year. What does Richard send me? A towel (with the design of a $100) and a cup that is like a long-extendable camera lens. I think Tiffany likes the gifts more than I do. lol. I don’t know why he sent me this or what his intentions are. I told him thanks. He asks me if I like the gifts. I can’t lie, I don’t! I have no use for it. 

Another example:

  • I was shopping with my mom and I saw something and said “Aww, it’s cute.” When I say it’s cute, it doesn’t necessarily mean I want it. Does it? What does she do? She goes out and buys it for me when I’m not with her. She also did this with a Versace perfume set thing she bought for me, for my birthday. Which is collecting dust, but apparently she uses it.

It’s the thought that counts.

I seriously have no idea what his thoughts were behind these gifts. I need to write a gifting guide for me. I hate getting gifts that I will not use or I don’t need. And my thoughts? It’s clutter.

I guess I just need to work on being more appreciative. But seriously when I say I don’t want anything, don’t get me anything. I can’t even make a decision on what I want. When I want something I’ll usually buy it myself. But it comes and goes often.

Anyways, my birthday is in 2 days. My flight is tomorrow!